Dec 6, 2012 - Communication    No Comments

Final Dystopian Story

There are a number of examples of very strong personal and creative expression in this piece, Sam.

I’m going to focus (by changing their colour to red) on the phrases and sentences that I feel may need a little more work. Often they are correct, but unclear or even simply clumsy. If you don’t know what I think is wrong, or don’t agree, feel free to discuss it in a comment on this page.

It was a dark and dingy day and it was pouring with rain. Everybody stayed in their homes and looked solemnly outside of the window and did not set a foot out of the front door. Beyond the Houses of Parliament, a gigantic mansion stood firm containing a master mind observing his city.

The sudden flush of sorrow lingered in the city streets until one man stood up to protest against the leaders.”Let us not sit in our homes pulling faces and watching the television. Our city was a comforting place and very peaceful, but do not let the power of our city’s pain and tribulation come upon us but let our freedom rise from the dead.”

He wondered down the middle of the road, knocking at each door and was always met by a man or a woman but this confrontation troubled his faith in the people of this city. In front of him stood the vicious guards of this city, he gave up with passion because of what he had done.  The air which was clear smelt of obnoxious food. He felt the loss of his city’s freedom struggling to enter,he heard the monstrous sound of his heart stampeding enormously,the city will gradually die with excruciating pain unless he could convince the guards to join him in a force to make our city a better place for everyone.“Lets say that you are me and your city has been totally demolished by an evil genius and many of his companions with lasers and mutant powers,what would you do? Other people are getting terrorised  by aliens and your just going to standing caging people in prison cells.Well, that is what I’m trying to do without you guards putting a burden on my back so are you in or are you not?

Nov 16, 2012 - Communication    1 Comment

Subordinate Clauses Homework

The man strolled down the street without knowing about what was going on around him.

She went to the market without considering that she needed help carrying the shopping.

The boy and his mates were going to the shop until they saw a group of blue hoodies.

Nov 15, 2012 - Communication    No Comments

Subordinate Clauses

It was a bright cold day in April.

The clocks were striking thirteen.

Winston Smith made an effort to escape the vile wind.

Winston slipped quickly through the glass doors of Victory Mansions.

Mr Smith could not prevent the swirl of gritty dust from entering with him

Nov 8, 2012 - Communication    1 Comment

Blog Introduction

Hi guys,

What’s up? My name is Sam and look at my new blog. This is so cool, we get to do our homework on the iPads and then put it onto our at least I think so.This is the best no writing just typing woohoo. Hoping you all the best with your new blog and I hope you all had a good holiday but just remember no writing just typing.

Sep 4, 2012 - Communication    No Comments

This is Your Online Domain

 Icon for Student Blogs at Edutronic.Net

Hello and welcome to your personal online journal.

This platform has been created to enhance and enrich your learning at the London Nautical School. Its purpose is to provide you with an audience for your work (or work-in-progress) and you have the choice (by altering the ‘visibility’ of your posts) of whether your work on here is visible to the world, or only to your teacher.

Anything you post here in the public domain represents you and thus it’s important that you take care with that decision, but don’t be afraid to publish your work – as the feedback you may get from people at home, your peers and people from around the internet is only likely to enhance it.

Remember you can always access your class blog and all manner of resources through the Edutronic.net main website – and by all means check out the sites of your peers to see what they’re getting up to as well.

If you have any questions for me, an excellent way to get an answer is to create a new private post on this journal. I am notified of any new posts and will reply swiftly to any queries.

Make the most of, and enjoy this new freedom in your English learning.

Righto!

 

Mr Waugh

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